The Action Figures... In Action:
"C'mon kid, use that razor knife and open that thing - we ain't got all day!"
"Is it just me Han, or did she look a lot better on the card!?!"
(Left) The rarest of all the new figures: a Princess Leia released from her package! (Right) Ahhhhhhhh!
"We will end this Rebellion once and for all. Forget your TIE Fighter, just bring the Big Gun and follow me!"
"Oh Han! We thought Boba Fett had turned you over to Jabba the Hutt... I'm so glad we all ate our Froot Loops, those tasty fruit flavored loops o' sugar, then mailed in the order form found on specially marked packages along with two proofs of purchase. We waited the allotted eight to twelve weeks then had to call the Kelloggs customer service number found on the box to find out where you were. But now that you're here we've decided to keep you encased in this Loopchamber because you'll be worth more in 20 years!"
"Master Yoda, I know that a Jedi should be able to hold himself up without using his sabers as ski-polls. But a Jedi should not have feet factory-formed at ridiculous angles necessitating the purchase of a second action figure to allow him to stand."
"Feet forming matters not! One leg I have and complain incessantly do I?"
"Well you got a little head!"
"Do too! And a girlly little blaster pistol."
"Do not! And at least I fit into my ship and can stand on my own!"
I can stand on my own, I just don't feel like it."
"Ok, arm... arm.
Butt... butt... wiggle"