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T-800 Endoskeleton

Movie Maniacs 5
by yo go re

Finally, we get a Movie Maniac who lives up to not only that name, but the "Ultra-Action Figure" moniker as well. While most of the Maniacs (and really, all of McFarlane's toys) have been little more than tiny affordable statues, this killing machine lays them all to waste.

This is the Endoskeleton of the T-800 cyborg sent back in time by the resistance to protect John Connor - the future leader of the human revolution - from a dangerous new shape-shifting cyborg. Though normally covered with human-like flesh, the Endoskeleton is what lives beneath the skin.

Notice how careful they are to say that this is the Terminator from T2? Like you can tell the difference. Like the one in the first movie had a distinctive birthmark on his thigh or something. Whatever. They're just covering their butts since they don't have the license for the original movie. Silly.

This is a beautiful piece. He's just as detailed as any McFarlane figure, but he moves. Oh how he moves! 20 points of ever-lovin' articulation: neck, six shoulder joints, elbows, forearms, chest, waist, hips, knees and shins. Half of the joints have working pistons that slide around when you move him. As you can see, he's articulated enough to duplicate the pose of last year's T-800 - but showing his superiority, he can also get in other poses.

McFarlane's sculptors obviously spent a lot of time examining the real Endoskeleton. Every plate and screw is wonderfully detailed, with a nice black wash making everything stand out. He's got those wicked red eyes staring at you from dark sockets, looking like the fires of hell. They even painted the teeth white (since the robots don't have silver smiles). As you can see in the in-progress sculpt, they nearly built this toy the way you'd build the real thing; I can't imagine how many pieces this is built from, or how long it would take to assemble.

Just why is the Terminator such a powerful cinematic villain? It's not just that he's unstoppable - every monster in every horror flick ever has been unstoppable. No, it must be something more.

Topped by a grinning chrome skull that looks like a cross between the teeth of the shark lurking just below the water and the grill of the eighteen-wheeler bearing down in your rearview mirror, the Terminator is obviously modeled after a human skeleton: just looking at it reminds us of our own mortality. Give that thing a purpose and a gun, and you're in trouble.

Give the Endoskeleton a once-over in the store before you head to the register; the first one I bought was missing one of the rods in his right forearm. Hmm. Do I return it, or just overlook such a minor error? Well, while playing around with the arm, trying to decide, the "bicep" piston snapped at the shoulder. Oddly enough, the same thing happened when I was cleaning the junk off my werewolf, so be careful - it looks like "pistonsnapitis" could be the new "McJoint."

In any case, the Endoskeleton's forearms can be removed (and replaced) fairly safely and easily. I... "accidentally" forgot to put the forearm back in the package when I returned the figure, so now it's standing in as the original damaged arm from 1984 (to see how it looks in that capacity, take a look at our Sarah Connor review).

The figure's hands are made of a somewhat soft plastic, giving them a bit of flex and allowing you to slip that pulse rifle in there. On a side note, what kind of laser gun needs a silencer? That's just silly.

He also comes with one of the piles of ever-so-easy to crush human skulls, which leads to side note two: why were there just piles of skulls in the future? Most of us are full of not skulls, but rather those long thin bones (214 of them, if Sarah's to be believed) that are so indistinctive when crushed beneath a steel foot. Were the Terminators sorting our remains? Why? So they could trod upon them dramatically? Shouldn't they have been busy destroying the resistance?

The T-800 Endoskeleton is definitely a five-star figure. He's got the sculpt that McToys is known for, the articulation that all the Movie Maniacs should have had since beginning. He looks great by himself, but looks even better as part of the Terminator family. Buy one, buy an army... you won't be disappointed.

-- 10/10/02

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