Buzz-Saw

Like Quicksilver, the bio Super7 put on the back of Buzz-Saw's box was illegally copied from the Thundercats wiki (one of them, anyway); like we said in that review, we're available to do copywriting, and companies that don't take us up on it are missing out. We have not, however, proved that we've got what it takes to write circles around everybody else. So consider this an audition: When Mon*Star's Limbo Mob needs to cut justice short, they count on the walking war machine, Buzz-Saw! Where Mumbo Jumbo's job is brute force, Buzz-Saw brings a more targeted destruction, slicing through any obstacle the Silverhawks can put in his way. Not even distance can save you from getting split, thanks to his ability to hurl his projectile blades at any target. And that's how it's done. Buzz-Saw is, as that beautifully scribed prose seamlessly told you, some sort of giant robot. Is it just him, or are there a whole line of these things wandering the Limbo galaxy? He gets blown to bits in the show's second episode, then shows up again in the third; did Mon*Star have Hardware rebuild him, or did they just go buy a new one like you'd replace a damaged phone? Unclear! The toy is massive and blocky, matching the cartoon art, and he definitely looks more like a robot than a guy in a suit of armor. He's just a stack of geometric shapes, spheres and cylinders and angled planes, all adding up to a massive beast who's mostly smooth and undetailed, but still a distinctive object. Living up to his name, Buzz-Saw has five circular saws jutting out of his body, and four of the ones on this toy spin freely for pretend cutting action: the ones on the back of his forearms and sticking out of his shoulders at an angle. Those are all the same size, while the one on his head is smaller. In the cartoon, he could pull the ripcords on his chest to really set those blades a-rippin', but it doesn't work that way on the toy. We can simulate it, though, thanks to the inclusion of swappable pull-cords, extended out several real-world inches from the toy's chest. None of the included hands have articulated fingers to allow him to grip the handle properly. They also declined the opportunity to make the blades on his arms removable, for the times when he throws them like a frisbee. More pretending for us. Articulation is plentiful, but merely "okay." Some logical things, some oddities. Like, both sets of hands have hinges that go pinky-to-thumb (on a hand that only has two fingers, but you understand we're talking direction more than anatomy) instead of back-to-palm like you'd want them to. The elbows are swivel/​hinges, but they go into the forearm at an angle, so they'll look like they're hanging naturally despite his wide body; that does make posing them a little weird, but the upper arm being a perfect cylinder and the elbow the shape of a ball will allow you to work around that. The shoulders are balljoints, like the head, the waist swivels, the hips are swivel/hinges, the thighs turn, the knees are hinged and the lower leg turns right underneath them, which is pointless since the ankles can also turn like that in addition to the swivels and hinges for the feet. The shoulders pop off a bit more easily than we'd like, but they go right back on, no problem. The joints are all sturdy enough to support the weight of this big toy. Buzz-Saw includes three heads, and the design of them makes almost zero sense. The one he has on in the tray has the mouth closed, and though the saw on his scalp has sculpted teeth, it's a solid part of the head and doesn't turn. Okay, fine, maybe they couldn't figure out a way to leave enough room for both a turning blade and the socket for the neck joint, whatever. But the second head, which also has the mouth closed, has a fully rotating blade sticking out of it! But instead of saw teeth, this is just a solid ring - you know, like you'd see if a sawblade was spinning very fast. So in other words: the head that will always look like its blade is spinning, no matter what, even when it's still, can spin even though it doesn't need to. What is the goddamn point of that, Super7? I think it's a question of the few millimeters difference between the saw teeth and the disc allowing enough space to turn, but why waste time making the part turn that will look like it's turning even when it's still? It's dumb! The third head makes more sense. It's the only one with its mouth open, so it actually looks different from the other two, and its saw blade can turn. Not easily - we said it "turns," not "spins." We already said that the figure included alternate hands, but they're about as pointless as the second head. The fingers are spread slightly wider than on the normal hands, wide enough to hold and throw one of his sawblades if Super7 had made that an option, but he'll have to be content with simply holding the big, six-barreled blaster rifle thing. Of course, he'll have to hold it between his fingers, instead of wrapping his fingers around it like a sane robot would do, but here we are. Possibly because it's more often Hardware's standard weapon; Buzz-Saw only ever used it in Episode 18, "The Ghost Ship." You can also replace his hand with the big arm cannon he used in Episode 37, "Undercover." Does Buzz-Saw have a little bird partner? You know he does! His is the adorably named "Shredator," which sounds like it should be fighting a different franchise entirely. Rather than two different birds, like the Silverhawks have received, this is a solo. His special attack was to spin like a whirlwind, using the spikes on his wings to help him cut through any surface. The vintage toy duplicated this by working like a top when you pushed down on the head; this version just has swivels where you can manually turn the head and tail and pretend the central body is spinning. Not as good. The wings are poseable, though it's hard to find a position where they look natural, and although the legs are separate pieces, they're held so close to the body there's no real benefit to it, no articulation or anything. The biggest redeeming feature, though? Shredator has a tiny little spinning blade sticking out of his head, just like Buzz-Saw does! Aww! There were some truly odd choices made with this toy, but none of them are bad enough to make him not fun to play with. Could they have done more? Yes. Is this a cool evil robot regardless? Yes. I'm not trying to build a full villain team, like I did with the Thundercats, but there was still no skipping out on Buzz-Saw. -- 08/20/23

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