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Alright, let's do this one last time:
When the quick-witted Peter Parker is felled by the Green Goblin and the Prowler, he passes on an important mission to Miles Morales.
"My name is Peter Parker. I was bitten by a radioactive spider, and for 10 years I've been the one and only Spider-Man. I'm pretty sure you know the rest. I saved a bunch of people, fell in love, saved the city, and then I saved the city again... and again and again and again. [...] Look, I'm a comicbook, I'm a cereal, did a Christmas album. I have an excellent theme song. And a so-so popsicle. I mean, I've looked worse. But after everything, I still love being Spider-Man. I mean, who wouldn't? So no matter how many hits I take, I always find a way to come back. Because the only thing standing between this city and oblivion is me. There's only one Spider-Man. And you're looking at him."
It's hardly surprising that Peter Not-B. Parker didn't get a figure in
the first (aka, "Into the") Spider-Verse toyline: it only got one series, it already had a Spider-Man in said series, and Not-B's design was just a regular Spidey like we could get in any line at any time. I mean, they already had to do Spider-Man Noir as a Johnny-come-lately store exclusive, there definitely wasn't going to be space for a release that could be replaced by any number of existing toys.
But hey, the Across line has made it to Series 2,
and even if it's filled with a bunch of repaints, there was finally room for the Peter Parker from Miles' reality. Peter B. was in Series 1, but that was just the existing May Thamtarana sculpt without the coat and shoes, and with new pieces to cover the exposed skin on the upper body. This figure uses those same new arms and chest, but nothing else: remember, this Spidey was more active than his counterpart, so he's more trim and therefore can't use the same torso. Even the head is narrower! It's nice that the webs on his costume are sculpted in, but it would be better if they were painted, too.
Series 1's "sweatpants Peter" had the same articulation as "raincoat Peter," meaning separate balljoints for the waist and chest.
But a new body means a chance for new joints. This figure has swivel/hinge ankles, swivel boots, double-hinged knees, swivel thighs, balljointed hips on a hinge, a hinged waist, balljoint chest, swivel/hinge wrists, double-hinged elbows, swivel biceps, swivel/hinge shoulders, a hinged neck, and balljointed head. Despite the extra joints (the combo in the torso, the hinges to drop the hips down), the range of motion on the toy and the overall poseability isn't great. Like, between the waist and chest, he can still only get to about 45°, when he should really be able to fold in half. The hips help a little, but this still feels like it should be better.
The figure does include absolutely the most important accessory it could, an unmasked head. Revealing that the Peter Parker we'd been seeing for the entire opening of the movie had blonde hair and blue eyes was a calculated shock meant to drive home to the audience that this was an alternate reality, so this figure coming with an unmasked head is almost a necessity. It's the same sculpt as before, just painted differently, but that makes sense if they're interdimensional counterparts of each other.
We get alternate hands for the figure (fists or thwips),
but nothing else. Giving him the USB goober he entrusts to Miles probably wouldn't have worked, unless they did it as something molded into another hand (like Spider-Punk's guitar pick), and there really isn't anything else we see him use. What they could have given him, though? The Santa hat and jingle bells he had on the cover of his Christmas album. A hat designed to fit on the masked head, a hand molded with bells, and a hand molded with the override key. There you go, three perfect extras we could have gotten but didn't. After all, if Hasbro wants to pretend this is $25 worth of toy, they need to at least make the effort to make it feel worth $25.
Peter Not-B. Parker isn't a thrilling action figure - he doesn't have some wild design or anything, he's just the generic vanilla version the rest of the film is built on. But because of his cartoon-accurate sculpt and his blonde Chris Pine head, he's still something new, something we don't already have in our collections. It makes sense that it took this long to get him, but it's still good that he's here. And just think: now that we have a fully plain sculpt, it opens up the door for any number of multi-colored members of the Spider-Society!
-- 12/30/24
Which alternate Spidey should this be painted into first? Tell us on our message board, the Loafing Lounge.
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