The Action Figures... In Action:
Episode 4
"Look Chewie, quit yer whining and face the facts. Either we got bigger or the Falcon got smaller in the past year and there's nothing we can do about it. Just sit back, buckle up, and hold your breath while we make the jump to hyperspace..."
"So, your grenades aren't real? Well, I've got a confession to make too... My rocket pack looks really cool but, heh heh, the rocket doesn't fire! Yep, the first one I had 20 years ago did but for some reason they stopped makin' 'em. As a matter of fact, half the gadgets on this suit don't work. But they do scare the socks off the 'bounty' I'm huntin'!"
"OK... stop right there! You've gotta see this Luke. Every time you pass the saber over R2, his eye just lights up. It's as if there's some sort of "lightpipe" built into his head!"
"Enough with the 'Ugly Leia' cracks, Han. You know that I meant to get on that Tauntaun!"
"Oh no Han! I can't believe you opened it! That's a .00 Ben Kenobi on error card. It has a half body shot of Ben on the back and all sorts of misspellings in the bio. It even has the discontinued long light saber! This guy down at the flea market said these are worth big spacebucks - but you went and ruined it..."
New From Kenner! It's the HAMMERHEAD™ vs. MOMAW NADON™ Battlepack! Now kids can recreate the exciting adventures of the CANTINA™ with both version of the character. The set includes HAMMERHEAD, a bloodthirsty bounty hunter with a SUPER MAGNUM ANIHILATOR™ weapon and an appetite for destruction! Also included is that peace-loving Ithorian botanist, MOMAW NADON. When MOMAW's not tending his petunias he can be found showing his sensitive side at the CANTINA. If MOMAW's feeling down, kids can either simulate wiping away the tears with the scale box of KLEENEX® tissues (included) or activate the GROUP HUG™ action feature by pressing a remote lever on his back! (Shown inset.) Available Christmas, 1996.
Poetry Corner
Little Men
(A Haiku)A scalper dances.
A smile appears on his face.
He has found Han Carb.
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