Sgt Slaughter puts his drill-instructor skills to the test whipping former-Cobra Viper Mercer and the other Renegades into shape with Slaughterhouse-style training.
It was a big deal when Hasbro signed a deal with Sgt. Slaughter to bring the legend to GI Joe Classified, so it's no surprise they're doing as many versions as they possibly can. The original one
was swiftly repainted in blue and green, aka "Slaughter's Marauders" colors (though they're now known as the "Mad Marauders" - either Hasbro wants to be able to use the team name in regions where he's called Sgt. Slammer or Sgt. Smasher, or they want to be able to continue using it even if they at some point decide not to renew his contract), and now we get a third in desert camo. I didn't realize the blue one was inspired by an actual vintage toy, a single-carded release from 1989, and so I surely didn't realize this one was based on a 2006 convention exclusive - though I guess that means he joins Kamakura in the "that's right, Generation 2 existed" pile.
The Sarge this one is homaging was made from a repainted Gung-Ho body, but they didn't do that this time: no, today he's a repainted Heavy Duty! But I never got that figure, so (other than the Grim-Viper) this is new to me! It's appropriately huge, and the torn-off sleeves suit him perfectly. Three dark green grenades hang on the back of his belt, and the brown, black, and white camo print on the pants is crisp.
This figure gets the same head as the others, with its mighty scowl, but it also includes a second alternate head. It doesn't look substantially different - same haircut, same chin - but is at least somewhat less angry? The big change is that this one has his whistle in his mouth, rather than hanging against his chest. That's pretty neat! And you can trade it to any of the other Classified Slaughters if you want.
Because of that, we don't get the existing whistle accessory. And while we do get the state trooper hat and the dark sunglasses,
we got more tha that as well. For instance, the same cap Gung-Ho had, though it's been remolded to remove the Classified-invented Marine Corps logo, and instead has a... skull with a lightning bolt on the forehead? Is Sgt. Slaughter a big fan of the Grateful Dead? Then we've got a red beret with the same logo. As Will West pointed out, the combo of "beret" and "desert colors" means you can re-create the era when the WWF had their patriotic military man switch sides just in time for the first Iraq war. As always, great instincts, Vince!
The figure includes a pair of fists, a pair of hands with the trigger finger out, and a flat chopping right hand. He has a large knife that sheathes on the left leg, a big revolver that holsters on his right, his baton, and a selection of guns: a weird SMG with a removable square silencer, a fairly normal machine gun with a grenade launcher underneath, and an advance grenade launcher with a belt of shells hanging out the side. Those last two have tan accents, to match his uniform, and the machine guns have separate magazines that are held in place by friction. This is the first version to not include a smaller action figure version of him, though.
The only reason you got to read that part of the review is that this is a two-pack, and you've gotta get Sgt. Slaughter if you want Mercer. The only Cobra trooper to ever defect to the Joes, Mercer has a hard
time getting his teammates to trust him - his 1991 figure had the wrong name and birthplace, which was later retconned to being him taking on a new identity so the other Joes would be more accepting of him. If they don't like the real you, man, they're not actually your friends.
Fittingly, Mercer still dresses kind of like a Viper - there's no mistaking those padded pants! The vest could be a reworked part of his old uniform, too (though it's a new sculpt here). The design is a pretty direct update of the 1987 original, with two large pockets on the right side of the vest and a holster on the left.They even got the thin technological armband he wore - the Joes trusted him so very much they gave him an electronic monitoring device. The glove on his right hand ocomes up nearly to his elbow, while the one on the left is barely taller than his wrist. There's a crossed-out Cobra logo on his chest, just above the holster. On older toys, that was a tattoo on his arm, which made sense from a story standpoint: you can imagine him getting a tattoo when he joined Cobra, and then hastily crossing it out when he switched teams.
Mercer gets two heads, both with that "Johnny Unitas on The Simpsons"-ass haircut. Neither has the beard he wore when he was hiding his identity.
Boo! One is vaguely unhappy and the other is completely snarling, and the sculpt of them is very distinctive; we'd lay money they were sculpted by the same person who did Warlord Professor X. You can accessorize either of them with the translucent yellow glasses, though (to borrow another joke from Will) that does make him look like he should be recording a YouTube video from the front seat of his lifted pickup truck complaining about pop culture.
The figure also includes alternate hands, but someone forgot to put any thought into them: we just said he's wearing gloves, but bother these fists are bare. Could they really not manage to make fists that had some padding on the knuckles? Are we supposed to take the rest of the glove off, too, or are we supposed to have him wearing leather cuffs when punching dudes?
His other accessories include a black backpack, a pistol with removable silencer, a knife that can fit in his boot, a regular machine gun (with tan accents, in case Sgt. Slaughter wants to use it) and an angular laser rifle. Both characters have their stats on the side of the packaging:
Sgt. Slaughter's are Leader 3, Hand-to-Hand Combat 4, Strength 3, and Classified 3 (aka "we didn't think of anything for this one"), while Mercer's are Mercenary 2, Light Weapons 2, Weapons Development 3, and Sabotage 3. Mercenary? Weapons Development? Do those really suit him? "Mercer" does technically come from the same root as "mercenary," but only in the sense that they both derive from the Latin merx, also the origin of "merchandise": see, a "mercer" is an obsolete word for someone who deals in textiles, meaning Larry Hama might as well have named this angry tough guy "Silk Shirt."
The pairing in this two-pack makes sense: Mercer thinks of Sgt. Slaughter as the only person who was willing to give him a chance after leaving Cobra, so his loyalty is more to Sarge than anyone or anything else. The other two Renegades have been announced for an upcoming two-pack, so it won't be long before the whole team is back together again.
-- 06/05/26
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