Hello hello everyone, your old pal Shocka here! Here and not standing behind you in your room, standing silently there right now, almost daring you to turn around and look. To see what's coming. To see what I've got in my hands, hands hovering so close behind your head now. Out of the corner of your eye you spot me - but surely it was just your imagination, yes? I couldn't possibly be standing behind you at this very moment.
Remember a full and literal decade ago, when we posted The Toy Alphabet of Cool
and The Toy Alphabet of Women
? I was meant to follow that up with the Toy Alphabet of Suck, but... didn't. Like I always say, if you're going to do something right, you might as well drag your feet for 10 years and then have to re-do half the work you did already because it's now so outdated. That's what we call "the Duke Nukem Forever
effect"! (Soon to be known as the We Happy Few
effect, but nobody's going to remember that game in a year.)