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Crypt Curse

by Shocka

So it would seem Xevoz has covered most of the classic movie monster, in their own unique style: we've seen the werewolf, a skeleton, Frankenstein's Monster - what's left? Why, the classic Mummy, of course! Not a ****ing Twilight vampire, you ninny.

These guys may be just a bit too tightly wound for their own good. It is believed that they were once all-powerful pharaohs of the ancient world's desert kingdoms. Entombed as mummies at the fall of their empire, they slept for centuries in treasure-laden tombs until looters, raiders, and a few rather unfortunate archaeologists managed to awaken their super-sized wrath. Back with a vengeance, these petrified Tut-types are rumored to control the desert's natural forces, summoning small armies of dust devils at will.

There are two important things to notice in that review: first of all, the line about "the ancient world's desert kingdoms" suggests that the planet the Xevoz inhabit (Geotopia) is the same as ours, just far in the distant, distant future. But more importantly, notice the way it refers to Crypt Curse in the plural, rather than the singular. The idea behind Xevoz was not that these were individuals, but rather representatives of a type: that's why the figure is called "Sky Grinder" and not "Surfer Simon." So if you want an entire army of Crypt Curses, go for it!

I'm a little surprised it took three series for Hasbro to get to a Mummy, but then the Xevoz lines has always been so packed with different and varied characters that it was probably an inevitability, and Crypt Curse does not disappoint. At his base, he's the classic movie Mummy, with his dark brown flesh wrapped in long white bandages (although the bands on both biceps were clearly intended to be painted a metal color, not left bandage-white).

But designer BJ Johnson (who also did all the stickers for the figures in Series 1 and 2) went the extra mile with this guy, making him essentially a two-in-one action figure: Crypt Curse's accessories include a second very-recoginzable head, the classic Anubis. Putting this head on him, with all of the other armor accessories (a neck extender, a long loincloth, some armored straps across his chest, shoulder pads that are shaped like canopic jars), turns him into a very archetypal Egyptian jackal monster. It's awesome! And naturally, you can load him up with your choice of stickers to make him your own. You even get your choice of open hands or closed fists.

And that's not all, of course - in addition to the other red-and-bronze accessories, including the expected armor and bladed weapons, he includes two slithery snake-like swords, shoulder pads, a Xevoz-ized version of the nekhakha flail, a tiny winged backpack, and some kind of small shield or plate that I can't figure out what it is. He has a Drain Attack piece shaped like a tick or scarab with strips of mummy bandages trailing off behind it. Oh, and his jokey "gag" piece? It's a chicken drumstick! See, because he's meat and bones, and it's meat and bones... okay, so the joke is kind of a stretch. It was originally designed for Franken'Punker anyway, but got shuffled off to Crypt Curse. Maybe the gag would have worked better there. Everything is of the high standard we expect.

Now we come to the contentious part again: a dreaded - "Dun dun DUN!!!" - action feature! Twisting around Crypt Curse's top half until it clicks, then pressing down on the button makes him spin around in a Tasmanian-Devil-style tornado attack. Now, while I like the feature and think it's fun, the implementation could have been better, as this is one of those action features that does, unfortunately, get in the way of the articulation, and overall look. The midsection joint is instead part of the spinning action feature, and will not stay stationary with ease, so you're likely going to have Crypt Curse looking to the side more than you'd like, which is kind of a bummer. Not an unsolvable bummer, mind you, if you're the kind of person who fixes toys and people with superglue (much more effective than just tying people to chairs before their fingers come off).

While it might drag Crypt Curse down a peg, it doesn't stop him from being another great entry into the Xevoz pantheon. I love this guy and he's a worthy inclusion into your collection, alongside your other movie monsters.

-- 10/05/14

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