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Disco Stu

World of Springfield
by yo go re

This review goes out to one of our special readers. You know who you are.

As I've said before, part of the reason that The Simpsons have endured where so many others have failed is that while they may all live in Springfield, not everyone knows everyone else. Though Apu is a member of the Springfield Volunteer Fire Department along with Ned Flanders, he can't tell Ned apart from Reverend Lovejoy. People move in different circles, but they can still interact, still graduate to a higher level.

He's Springfield's original disco duck, and he don't advertise. He's Disco Stu, the official emissary of '70s club music to the unenlightened masses of Springfield. Like Buddha pointing at the moon, Disco Stu thrusts his mighty finger skyward to the beat, baby, the beat.

Much like the '70s themselves, Disco Stu started out as a one-note joke. In preparation for the Evergreen Terrace Rummage Sale of "Two Bad Neighbors," Homer unearthed his old jean jacket. He had used the Rhinestone Nights Fashion Gun to "rhinestone up" his old clothing and, in an attempt to spell "disco stud," ran out of room before the D. When confronted with this otherwise useless piece of attire, newly introduced Disco Stu announced his aversion to self-promotion. Solid!

Disco Stu started showing up in many episodes, always getting his boogie down in one way or another. Recently it was revealed that - *GASP!* - Stu doesn't even really like disco music. Such is the complexity of a man named for a one-liner.

As the World of Springfield line scrapes ever-closer to the bottom of the barrel, Disco Stu was sure to get the action figure treatment. Stu stands 5⅛" tall (it's the big Horshack afro that does it) and moves at the Springfield Four. Oddly, his face looks a bit different than the show - rather than "old and saggy," the sculptors made him "slightly portly." Huh.

Stu's accessories are a gold record, a disco sales chart covering the years 1973-76 and a nifty reflective disco ball. So far Stu only talks on two environments: Main Street and the Retirement Castle. Between the two, he says four phrases:

  • "Disco record sales were up 400% for the year ending 1976!"
  • "So, do ya party?"
  • "Hey, Disco Stu doesn't advertise!"
  • "Woah, snow fox at 5 o'clock! ♪Disco Lady♫ Is this seat taken?"

Stu's in his white leisure suit, and the pink flames are sculpted on. His light blue shirt is open down far enough to show off his gold medallion and his studly chest hairs. What more could you want? The only thing missing are clear platform shoes that would let us see the (dead) goldfish inside, but there's no way that would work on a toy like this.

-- 06/02/03

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