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Miss Elizabeth

WWE Elite Collection
by yo go re

How would you like to be best known for sitting on a sweaty man while wearing a prom dress?

Miss Elizabeth first appeared in WWE in 1985 as the shocking managerial choice of newcomer "Macho Man" Randy Savage. Always classy and poised, Elizabeth quickly won the hearts of WWE fans and competitors alike, which did not always sit well with the "Macho Man." Despite their ups and downs, Elizabeth led Savage to his historic victory in a 14-man tournament to become WWE Champion at WrestleMania IV. One of the most beloved figures in WWE history, Miss Elizabeth created a legacy that paved the way for the Divas of today.

Eh, maybe. She was far from the first woman to step inside the ring, and although she was presented as a creature of beauty, it was always in a chaste, idealized way, not as a sex object. The romance between her and Savage was every bit as stylized as the fights between the good and evil wrestlers, just another piece of theater. Miss Elizabeth was always "lovely" or "stunning," never "sexy" or "hot." She was a perfect woman, but with the emphasis more on "perfect" than "woman."

Which isn't to say that Elizabeth wasn't attractive - she was. She just wasn't the drop-dead gorgeous specimen that the announcers tried to sell her as (and that many of the angles involving her demanded). She looked like a mom, not a model, but the exaggerated world of professional wrestling needed her to be more. Just like Andre the Giant needed to be 7'4" (instead of his real-life 7'0"), Miss Elizabeth needed to be a paragon of beauty.

Miss Elizabeth is the "Flashback" figure for Elite Collection Series 19, so of course she was incredibly hard to find. I eventually had to order this one from Will's World of Wonder, because that was cheaper than resorting to Amazon or eBay (Mattel offered her on their site, briefly; she somehow sold out during "pre-sales" that no one seemed to know how to access). But what was I going to do, not get her to go along with Macho Man? That would be ridiculous.

This is the first female figure I've gotten from Mattel's WWE line, so I can't say whether this body is unique or reused. Either way, it suits her. Naturally she wasn't as tall as the men, so the figure is a petite 6¼" tall (remember, Mattel's wrestling toys are in a 7" scale, more or less). She's not overly muscular, but she does have a bit more definition than you might expect.

Most of the body is hidden by a large white dress. This is a pretty iconic look for Elizabeth, appearing in lots of photoshoots and posters and most importantly, at Wrestlemania IV, as mentioned on the back of the packaging. The softgoods dress is a strapless number, closed with velcro in the back, and stitched with a large, poofy waist. Her white opera gloves are simply painted on, and she's wearing high heels. To really duplicate the Wrestlemania IV look, she'd also need to be wearing white stockings, but her legs are the same color as the rest of her skin.

The toy moves as well as any of the other Mattel wrestlers. She has a balljointed head, swivel/hinge shoulders, swivel biceps, hinged elbows, swivel wrists, a hinged torso, swivel waist, swivel/hinge hips, swivel thighs, double-hinged knees, and hinged ankles. It's more than she needs, as a simple manager/valet, but maybe you can re-enact the time she got in a fight with Sensational Sherri. Or sit her on Randy's shoulder to celebrate his win.

Which brings us to another point: Elizabeth comes with no accessories. Macho Man didn't come with his title belt. Mattel should really have included the belt here, since they're already, in a way, completing a set. It's not like he never gave her the belt to carry for him, after all. Come on, Matty! Throw us a bone here! Savage needs his belt!

Wrestling fans loved Miss Elizabeth the way the Knights of the Round Table all loved Guinevere - as an ideal, rather than a person. It wasn't until much later that any sex began to creep in. Her role in the WWF of the '80s was as important, in its way, as Hulk Hogan or Randy Savage themselves, so it's nice that Mattel gave her a worthy toy. Shame it was so hard to find.

-- 02/26/14

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